What’s Standing in Your Way?

What stands in the way becomes the way.

– Marcus Aurelius

I used to consider it inevitable that when I went away on holiday, I would eat less healthy and not have time for focused exercise. I had sort of resigned myself to time away being time off from fitness and having to make up for it when I returned.

I then realized that I was creating this world by equating a break in routine with not being able to get healthier and stronger. Since then, I’ve made it a point to come back from vacations even healthier and stronger than when I left.

How to achieve this can obviously be challenging, but I find the answers unfold from the decision for it to be this way. Now having a baby and being without our nanny, this presents even more of a challenge.

However, one of my favorite principles, which I read in ‘Meditations’ by Marcus Aurelius, I’ve learned to quickly apply when I encounter challenges. That thing which I *think* is an obstacle is not only a path (as in a direction) but it is almost always actually the means to accelerate me towards the end result.

My 5 Step Process For Creating

As a reminder (initially for myself), I’ve summarized my process for creating everything into 5 stages. My clients are finding it useful as well, so I’m sharing with you too.

1. I witness.
2. I access.
3. I intuit.
4. I act.
5. I allow.

If you have questions – or want me to unpack anything – please ask! 🙏🏼❤️

The Inefficacy of Consideration

I find that most consideration prior to taking action is only delaying the inevitable. When as a practice one stops considering and simply acts more often, besides gaining back the time that would have otherwise been spent in consideration, there is an unexpected secondary gain in productivity. I would even go so far as to say that consideration is inversely proportional to FLOW.

The Rise of Emojis

In David Abram’s book ‘The Spell of the Sensuous’ he shares a theory as to how the evolution from symbolic to phonetic language was instrumental in disassociating humans from their embodied sensuous connection to each other and the earth.

I have read also that the Garden of Eden myth represents this same transition in that the birth of language, which sliced up reality into separate conceptual bits, was the bite of the apple from the tree of knowledge of good and evil.

The recent frequent use of emoji’s to express oneself is looked down upon by many as a descent from the nobility of language. However, I am enjoying using them as an exploration in the merits of their subjectivity and what they evoke.

Each emoji here represents a functional idea about my identity, which I do daily work with to inculcate as habitual thought. I find that contemplating the ideas via the symbol gives me access to more diverse interpretation and richer meaning, lending power to the installation and efficacy to their function.

What do you think of the increasing use of emojis? How are you using them?

How to Transcend FOMO (Fear of Missing Out)

My wife and I share an ‘Explorer’ personality style which is commonly rooted in a childhood fear of missing out.

This expresses itself in novelty-seeking and a nearly unquenchable desire for diversity of experience.

An unhealthy version of this is a constant shifting of attention to new things, resulting in never accessing any depth or creating anything of significance.

Growth within this style is to learn to experience diversity within focused contexts.

For example, my wife has shown me how to experience novelty and diversity in the nuance and subtlety of foods. In my work, I experience diversity within a fixed profession by coaching entrepreneurs and leaders from a myriad of industries.

On our recent 10 night holiday in Hawaii, we focused in on the single island of Kauai. (No coincidence that when I was younger and came for 10 days I visited two islands.)

However, as planned, halfway through our trip we switched resorts from the south to the north of the island. In hindsight, we did this because we could not decide which one would be better. I had suggested ‘Let’s just do both’!

Often, ‘both/and’ is a great transcendent option. In fact, an orientation for diversity can be crucial in developing the skill of seeing integrative both/and solutions in complex situations.

At the same time, for me personally, if I’m not conscious it can also be a reflexive response to my fear of missing out.

We agree that we could have stayed at just one resort for 10 days and, if we had, then our time would have been less rushed and even more relaxing.

This, I think, is relevant more generally too; that the fear of missing out is fundamental in my habitual hurriedness.

What I see is that the more I make conscious choices NOT from a fear of missing out – the more I choose to find diversity and novelty in more nuanced ways – then the more relaxed and at peace I feel.

I’m reminded of the 10 day silent retreat I did in India in 2006. I would sit for hours on a bench just looking at the trees. There was infinite depth for me there and I hardly moved a muscle.

Every morning my son and I wake first and we head out of the room so his mother can get more sleep. I follow him around the massive resort as he greets everyone he comes across. After commenting on how cute he is, they often remark; “He is quite the Explorer!”

When they do, I imagine all of the life and growth ahead of him.

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