How to Choose Between Two Paths in Life
“How do I know which path to choose when there are two (or more) paths that I want to take in life?”
Imagine you are hiking without a map and come to a fork in the trail. How do you decide which way to go?
In his poem ‘The Road Not Taken‘, Robert Frost suggests you should take the one less travelled:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
He was almost right. But not quite.
What if I want to go BOTH ways?
How do you decide which way to go when both directions seem equally appealing? What do you do when both life paths are equally desired? Here is an answer that may seem obvious, but evades most people:
Walk straight between the two paths, creating a third path.
When you want to do two (or more) different things in life, the solution is simple: combine them.
One coaching client wanted to be a painter and a hypnotherapist. Together we created the idea of Art-Hypnotherapy.
Another client wanted to remain a lawyer and own an eco-village. We created the idea of being an attorney who owns an eco-village where important negotiations are made.
I wanted to coach powerful leaders AND travel AND take people on adventures AND make a difference in the world. It was by combining these things that I created the idea for Hero Journeys.
How do I combine my different paths?
If there were an answer out there already, then it wouldn’t be a unique path – it wouldn’t be your path.
Combining is a process of creation.
The only tool you need is imagination. Or to use Walt Disney’s term: Imagineering
This is how both the iPhone and the Great Pyramids got made. They each started in someone’s imagination.
Your unique life can be created in this same way.
What if combining my paths is difficult?
“But what if when I get to the fork, there is a mountain in between the two paths?”
Then climb the freaking mountain!
Creating your own path is simple, but it won’t be easy.
How you will accomplish the task of climbing the mountain is unknown. This is how creation works; you cross a threshold into the unknown and go on a journey of discovery and manifestation.
The only thing you can be certain of about your path is that it will be riddled with uncertainty.
When you create the third path, you will create the life that is most true, and unique, to you.
What if I don’t succeed?
In the end, it won’t matter how far you made it up the mountain. You won’t care where you got to.
What you will care about is which way you chose to travel. What will truly matter is whether you followed a path or whether you went straight ahead, lead by your heart, climbed the mountain and created your own way.
The path less travelled is still someone else’s path.
Don’t be Robert Frost. Be who YOU are.
He actually doesn’t say that about less-travelled paths. The poem admits that both paths were worn “really about the same”. The older man looks back on his past and distorts the earlier experience to make himself seem more heroic. (“I shall be telling this with a sigh / Somewhere ages and ages hence”. What is that “sigh”? – some sort of rhetorical flourish to make the experience seem profound?) The wise point is that it is only looking back long afterwards that we can make any assessment of how our journey has proceeded – and even then we are at the mercy of our own distortions.
That is about ten times deeper than I’ve ever understood his poem, but now that I read it again, that makes sense! I think the common interpretation, especially based on how often it’s quoted, is to champion the path less travelled. Hence the positioning for my article! 🙂
Robert-Louis, Too bad you’re not in London to join me at this tonight…
http://www.meetup.com/JCF-MRT-London/events/117597112/
I just discovered the group today.
Yes, too bad I’m not around. I’ll be spending the evening instead marking essays about Joseph Campbell. Will that be decent enough compensation? Maybe next time. How often are these things?
You are an inspiration!
That is a very good one their. I have been what path to take being a med student or an electronics engineering student. I always wanted both profession but then the two are so opposite. I cannot find any field that requires both skills. I think I need to search more. And again Thank You for that wonderful article. Most of my questions are now answered and i now know an idea on what to choose or I mean I am not gonna choose between the two. I kind of like the idea of it. Anyway, regards to you author.
Glad you enjoyed it, Zesa! Much Love, John
what if your paths are too different? I see how you could combine most life paths but what about the ones nearly impossible to even consider combining? I cannot see a world of both fashion and forensic psychology, two passions of mine, coming together. Please help!
Biomedical engineering is about as close as it comes to my knowledge.
This was just the insight I needed.
Recently I have been in somewhat of a crisis.
First year undergrad, panicked in first semester and deferred for awhile to figure out what the hell I was doing wrong.
Instead of deciding between engineering and outdoor education I have decided on both. One day I will take nerds into the outdoors and foster a strong natural connection within the future technical leaders of our world. I have found my mountain, for that I thank you John.
This is awesome, Jaymes. I love your creativity.