How to Love Everyone You Meet – Live Q&A
While speaking at the Inside Out Movement in Zurich earlier this year, someone asked me, “I want to love all humans. How can I get to that point?”
In watching this clip of myself, I had to cringe a number of times.
Firstly, because I spend the first two minutes giving the guy Florien a hard time for asking the question the way he did. I’m framing my response up as trying to help him ask more empowering questions, which is true and useful, but in hindsight, I can see also that my motivation was to remind myself not to buy my own bullshit when people ask me advice.
Ironically, after beating him up for asking my advice, I ended up giving him some advice anyway…just in the form of a question.
Through dialogue, I shared my ideas on how loving people is not about what we need to do, but what we need to STOP doing.
The even bigger and final cringe for me is how the video ended. After our five minute conversation, Florien is even more confused. I decided to take the route that this was a good result, which in many cases can be true, but in this case I think it was a cop-out.
It would have been useful if I followed my own advice in this moment. If I had loved my inner judge of myself as ‘someone who has the answers’, maybe then instead of trying to stop that self from showing up, I could have actually heard Florien. Maybe if I’d been easier on myself, I wouldn’t have gotten in my head so much.
I think the truth is I didn’t have a good answer because I struggle with the same thing.
So much so that I once asked a mentor of mine a very similar question!
“How can I create in myself a desire to serve everyone I meet?”
His response was simpler and much more useful:
“Think loving thoughts.”